the long and winding road...

Still waiting on our LID... I know think?? we already have one, I just don't know what it is. I heard today that the families whose dossier's were sent by our agency to China on 1/6/06 received a log in date LID of 1/24/06. That means with our LID should be around the middle of February. I'll be so happy to have one. For anyone who doesn't know, the LID is the date that China uses to line up referrals. So, pretty much they go in chronological order and that's your place in line. The next referrals should be out in a week or two and will be for LIDs 5/13/05 --->?? No one knows for sure but I've heard rumors that they'll go through 6/6/05. That would be more than 3 weeks worth which would be great cuz the last couple sets of referrals have only been for a 2 week period of time. That would mean that referrals would be taking 8-1/2 mos from LID which is not so bad. I've been setting myself up for a 10 month wait for referral so 8 mos would be a huge improvement!!!

There's been quite a bit of talk on APC lately about the ages of children to be referred --its gotten me thinking quite a bit. We requested 5-10 month old girl, as young as possible (AYAP). China considers an infant to be any child up to 24 mos. I personally have never seen a referral that old, except where its been requested, and most of the babies are between 8 and 14 mos old. Lately, they've been even younger, 6-9 mos. Some people are just adamant that there is a baby out there "meant for them" --either in the religious context or not and therefore age is not an issue. Some feel that they have put their trust in the CCAA to match them with the "perfect" child for them. I personally do not feel that way. I don't have the religious connection and I sure as heck don't think that a government worker in a country half way around the world looking at our passport pix and our little commercial (aka dossier materials) has any tremendous insight. I believe they do the best they can. I've heard they try to match up by appearance and personality but, whatever. I just don't think they have enough information about the families or the babies to do that successfully.

One thing's for sure, I know that we will love the child referred to us, that one's easy. Children are so innocent and beautiful and I think human beings are just "built" in a way that when you are put in a position of care of another living thing, not just children here, you love them. I believe that parental love is a natural instinct.

Anyway, point is that either way, I still really do want a child AYAP. I really love the idea of adopting from China but I could have found my child somewhere else. Vietnam just opened their adoptions again and the few referrals I've heard of are for very young babies, like 2 mos old. That's very appealing to me. Of course, we could have gone with Guatemala where the babies are also very young but that just didn't feel like a match. Overall, I think China is the best choice for our family.

So what would we do if China decided to refer our family a child far outside our expectations? A boy perhaps. It's happened. I can unequivocally answer that if we were referred a boy we would request another referral. I love my boys but that's just too different from the experience we're expecting. Plus, I know some families would be so thrilled to have a little boy. How about an older girl, say 3 yrs old? Would we accept that referral? I don't know, I'm not sure. Truly, I hope that doesn't happen but if it did and we accepted the referral, I know we'd love her. Plus I'm sure in the future we would look back and not even be able to imagine our lives without this particular child. Just like Brett and Casey.

I love you Baby Girl, I just haven't met you yet!!!

"And when at last I find you
Your song will fill the air
Sing it loud so I can hear you
Make it easy to be near you
For the things you do endear you to me
You know I will
I will."